Then I realized I was worried about the reactions of the two or three snarky, sarcastic and critical members of our department to what I was going to present. These guys and their "too cool for school" attitudes made me really stop and think - actually question - the content and approach I was going to take. Imagining their sneers and snickers, I nixed a reading I usually did at the beginning of the workshop to give people context and freedom to play and make ugly art. I started to retool things in a way that I thought might be more palatable to the nay-sayers.
And then, I started to think about the others in the group. The 98% who are open, curious, fun-loving, want to learn and already like and support me. Why was I worried about those unhappy few who had a chip on their shoulder about everything? Why was I catering to negativity, giving it more power? Why cheat those who are open for the sake of those who are closed? And furthermore, why sell out and stifle the voice of my authentic self in order to try to please those who might find me and what I bring untenable?
That really hit home, and I started to look at my life. Across the board, I was wasting time and energy trying to people-please the people who are least likely to ever be pleased by anyone or anything. And, of course, by doing that, I am selling myself short and pleasing no one. Especially me.
In the amazing way the universe works, the very next morning, the morning of my workshop, Seth Godin posted about the very same theme.
Lady Gaga doesn't care if Seth listens to her. Why should I care if a couple of negative-nasties like what I do? Why throw energy away like that? So I didn't. I did my workshop they way I wanted to do it, with all of me showing and vulnerable (interestingly, the folks I was worried about weren't even there that day!)
And everyone loved it. Including me.
And I love it too. This is SO relevant. I struggle with this myself. GOOD for you for staying true to yourself!
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